the secret lives of prothros.

April 13, 2010

a confession…

Filed under: Uncategorized — prothro @ 4:00 pm

So I know I’ve been neglectful of my sweet little home on the internet lately and I thought I’d make it up to the world wide web by sharing a little confession.

So here it is, are you ready?

I have a stress whisker.

Yep. It’s white and wiry and grows out of my chin whenever life gets tumultuous.

The majority of the year I have a smooth, stress-free chin. Then those days of stress fall into life and before I know it, there is my whisker.

Luckily, it’s white.

And luckily it hangs pretty close to my face.

I usually don’t even notice it. That is, until I think to myself “Man, life has been stressful lately. Oh! I bet my whisker is back!” Then sure enough, as I slowly feel my way across my chin, rubbing my finger back and forth in search of my whisker, I find it, waiting for me.

You’d think I’d find it disgusting. In some ways I guess I do. Mostly, though, I feel like it is an affirmation–that the internal stress and craziness of my life is real. It has a tangible, physical expression and existence.

As soon as I find it, I run to the bathroom to pluck it. I hold it in the tweezers to see how long it returned. I like to think there is some correlation between stress level and whisker size. Hopefully, some conclusive research will follow.

Once it’s gone, I have no idea when it will return again. Usually months.  Though once during a very crazy season of life, it returned fully-grown after just four days.

My stress whisker most definitely visited me a few weeks ago.

It was good to see ol’ whitey. To know that my chin had noticed just how crazy life was, that I wasn’t making it up in my head.

Oh stress whisker! Stress whisker!
Hide in my face.
When life gets crazy
I’ll find you in your place

Yep, just wrote an impromptu poem to my stress whisker. I should have been ashamed enough of this post already. Maybe I should have stayed away from the internet just a little bit longer….



  1. a guy i know gets them on his forehead

    Comment by Dr Wells — April 13, 2010 @ 11:36 pm

  2. That is one of the most random and hilarious posts I’ve ever read! I was slightly timid about scrolling down to see what you had taken a picture of. 😉

    Comment by Katie — April 14, 2010 @ 4:55 am

  3. ha!

    Comment by Jess — April 14, 2010 @ 9:42 am

  4. I will smile the rest of the day!

    Comment by Tom Prothro — April 14, 2010 @ 10:27 am

  5. i’m still kind of hoping that evan wrote this.

    but i know he’s not that good of a poet.

    Comment by dw — April 15, 2010 @ 12:49 pm

  6. Your poem goes perfectly to the tune of Matchmaker from Fiddler on the Roof, and when I read your poem, I naturally sang it to myself :-).

    Comment by Ben Menchaca — April 15, 2010 @ 1:07 pm

  7. ahahaha! You better be glad it’s a friendly innocent whisker and not a fever blister or something that SCREAMS, “Hi Im stressed” to the world.

    Comment by laura — April 23, 2010 @ 1:43 pm

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